Public Behavior
Public Stance, Social Niceties
noun
We all build up something in front of ourselves. It's the front we present to the world, the public behavior, public stance and social niceties that maintain harmony.
建前 is very important in Japan. For example, you might find yourself invited to an acquaintance's home out of courtesy, with the expectation that you’ll decline (also out of courtesy!). A host of a party may say "just bring yourself," but guests know this could be 建前, and considering their own 建前, they bring a small gift anyways. People can also be reluctant to say "no" to things, like drinks with coworkers when they really want to go home, and may not to show it when they find situations inconvenient or unpleasant. So you might need some guesswork to peek behind the 建前 that people build up in front of themselves!
The reading is pretty strange. It's a lot like 建物 in that it's read as たて, which is like the word 建てる even though the て isn't showing here. So, you'll have to remember it's read like 建てる but the て gets pushed into the kanji.
建前を言う
to say social niceties, to speak formally
建前を使う
to adopt a formal stance
建前を使い分ける
to use different levels of formality as appropriate
建前にこだわる
to insist on formalities
建前に過ぎない
nothing more than a social nicety, nothing more than a formality
建前にする
to adopt a formal stance
建前になっている
to be in a formal manner
建前上
in appearance, ostensibly
本音と建前
private and public selves
ビエトは本音と建前を使い分けるのが上手い。
Viet is good at separating his public and private selves.
それは建前上、そういうことにしてるだけですよ。
They're just pretending that's the case for appearance's sake.
よく「本音と建前」は日本独特の文化だと言われますが、世界中どこの国にもあるものですよ。
It is often said that "the contrast between one’s personal feelings and public behavior" is a uniquely Japanese culture, but it is found in every country in the world.