Whatever you say through a satellite turns into Noh chanting. It gets all drawn out and distorted from going through the satellite, which makes it SOUND like Noh chanting at least.
While you're fake Noh chanting you have to pause every few minutes to take a bite of yogurt (よう). Yogurt is good for the throat! At least you think it is. It's not like you're actually chanting, the satellite is doing all the real work.